


Never Place A Bet Against Matt Murdock and Foggy Nelson

by ShutUpWylow



Category: Daredevil (TV), idk buzzfeed
Genre: 100 percent platonic though, Multi, Sex Talk, and karen, arousal talk, but yeah, cause fuck yeah, everyone on that show is cute, here it is, ignore me, matt murdock is so cute though, so is foggy, this is incredibly dumb, this mess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-19
Updated: 2015-06-19
Packaged: 2018-04-05 05:01:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4166919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShutUpWylow/pseuds/ShutUpWylow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“(Y/n), what happens if we lose?” “Karen, babe, there’s no way we can lose.” </p><p> </p><p>“I can't believe we lost.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never Place A Bet Against Matt Murdock and Foggy Nelson

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so this was a thing I wrote at like 3 in the morning a while back. So I apologize for this, it is incredibly dumb and probably OOC but i don't care. So yeah, enjoy this monstrosity. Also yes most of the dialog is from a buzzfeed video, thought I made it semi clear through the fandom tags. Again I wrote this at 3 am, after watching some stupid ass buzzfeed video.

HI THERE THE DIALOUG FOR ONE PART IS FROM A BUZZFEED VIDEO, DON'T LIKE THAT? THEN DONT FUCKIN READ IT. STOP FUCKIN COMMENTING THAT, YES I KNOW

“So, Karen. What do you think about the new client?” The tall girl simply hummed in response as she turned to her (s/c) skinned friend. “What are you on about (y/n)?” Grabbing her face and making Karen look at the client, Karen 'Oh'ed softly. “He totally killed his girlfriend.” “I know right!” (Y/n) cried, releasing Karen's face and throwing her arms into the air. 

“We don't pay you two to sit around.” Foggy chided as he walked by to grab something from his office. “You don't pay us at all.” Karen replied as she leaned on her desk and stared at Foggy. He came around from the door frame and pointed at her. “Is out love and devotion not enough for you two?” “Love and devotion doesn't pay the bills!” (Y/n) added to the conversation, making Foggy glance at her questionably. “It's true Foggy and you know I'm right. Because for real how the hell does Matt pay for his apartment? Compared to my apartment he lives in a fucking palace. Does he have two jobs or three or something. Is he taking handouts for being blind? Because he's just as poor as me and yet he has an amazing apartment. While me and Karen can hardly afford our SHARED apartment!”

“Karen and I.” Matt corrected the (h/l) (h/c) haired girl as he closed the door behind him. “Sneaky bastard.” She muttered under breath. “That wasn't very nice.” “Matt! Stop using you super sonic hearing on me! I should be allowed to mutter under my breath without you listening in like the god damn NSA!” Matt sighed and ruffled her hair as he walked past her. The girl sitting in her rolly chair in front of Karen's desk. Grumbling as she tried to fix her hair (y/n) turned back to Karen.

“Anyway.” She said, rolling her eyes at both Foggy and Matt. “Back to what we were talking about.” “About how our client is totally lying?” “That would be the conversation.” Foggy suddenly pushed the chair out of his way. “That is no way to talk about our client.” (Y/n) yelped as the chair toppled over, causing her to fall on her side. She got up and smacked Foggy in the back of the head. “That is no way to treat one of your only friends.” 

Foggy was about the give some sarcastic remark when Matt cut him off. “You're both right, now. Karen, (Y/n) why do you think he did it?” “Isn't it obvious with your superpower?” He simply shrugged, urging the girl to go on. She sighed and picked up her chair, setting it back upright. Everyone watched as she settled into her chair.

“Well, the way he's fidgeting every time either of you bring up his now deceased girlfriend. As someone who is regularly nervous, fidgeting is something we do often. Also, you did say that out clients ex-girlfriend looked remarkably like Karen. Hence, why he immediately started apologizing when he saw Karen. He thought death was finally coming for him, or something, because Karen looks like the girl he killed.” 

Karen stood behind (Y/n) her arms crossed as she stared down the two males in the room. “What she said.” The high fived and went back to reorganizing the files. Karen watched out of the corner of her eye as Foggy shifted uncomfortably before pulling Matt into his office. The two girls could hear the hushed whispers. Both of the males rethinking agreeing to this case. Finally they emerged, the girls hurrying to get back to work. To look as if they weren't eavesdropping. 

“We have a bet to make with you two.” “Oh, I love bets. We thinking strip poker or what?” “Not that kind of bet (y/n).” “Killjoy.” Matt smiled at the girl and started to pick up where Foggy left off. “If we lose the case, I will go to every prostitute in the city and offer them bibles. Foggy with have to play strip poker with you (y/n).” Karen and (y/n) thought before looking at the boys again. “What's in it if you two win?” “We were hoping you could think of something.”

(Y/n) smiled and clapped her hands together. "Okay, if you win this case. Me and Karen have to answer any really weird questions you guys have about girls being aroused." "That's oddly specific." "Well, Foggy. I'm not playing truth or dare with you assholes were I can't lie. You'll make me kiss Matt or something." "You act like that's a bad thing." "Shut up Matt." 

(Y/n) and Karen smiled, holding their hands out to the boys across from them. “Do we have deal?” “Deal.” The four shook hands, the girls watching as the boys went back into the interrogation room as (y/n) liked to call it. “(Y/n), what happens if we lose?” “Karen, babe, there’s no way we can lose.” 

 

“I can't believe we lost.” (Y/n) could hear Karen groan as she laid her head on the table in front of them. “Get ready for torture!” They both shivered as they heard Foggy. They both desperately looked around the interrogation room for a way out. 

“I can't believe you got us stuck in this mess.” “Hey! I am blaming Matt for this. Sneaky bastard knew this would happen.” “Yes I did.” “Oh fuck you Matt!” Matt chuckled and sat across from the (e/c) eyed girl. Foggy sat across from Karen, a folder of papers in his hands. “Lets get started shall we.” 

“First off we're confusing creatures.” Karen started. “Women are very confusing, I agree.” (Y/n) added thoughtfully. “And there's like thousands factors that go into it. A guy could just pop a boner, there are a million factors that go into when a women would feel aroused.” Nodding Foggy opened the folder and pulled out a list of questions. “Since Matt is blind, I'm gonna read the questions.” “Well, that's rude.” “Shut up Matt.” Foggy countered before turning to the two mortified girls. “We are gonna die here aren't we Karen?” “It was nice knowing you (Y/n).” Foggy cleared his throat and read the first question.

“What does it feel like?” “Loaded question but metaphorically speaking it feels like an itch you have to scratch.” “Yeah but when you're really aroused you get very wet.” Karen added, not really wanting to talk about this. “It gets real, but it's also like exercise. Except you don't hate it, there’s sweat and endorphin's and happy excitement, your hearts racing.” The boys nodded, like they were in a class trying to take notes or something when Foggy asked the second question. 

“What turns you on?” “Eyebrows.” Karen said, throwing it out there. “If you're eyebrows are on point, it is just done.” “Oh Karen, you poor soul you.” “What?” “Anyway, have you seen Buffy the Vampire Slayer?” The sentence causing Karen to jump in her seat and shake her head rapidly, a smile on her face. “Like the relationship between Buffy and Spike.” (Y/n) fanned herself dramatically as she leaned back in her seat. Karen laughed and continued to answer the question. “Good sense of humor, good style, nice dick.” “Karen!” (Y/n) yelled trying not to laugh her ass off. “What? I don't want to have sex with you if your dick looks like trash!” (Y/n) just nodded and tried to continue. “I mean I could like something one day and then completely hate it the next.” “Or like one day you're totally not into it, then you see a good ankle.” (Y/n) snorted and continued to talk about it. “If you're talented at anything. Like you could be the worlds best actor and I'm going to be just as attracted to you if you were like the worlds whistling champion.” “Also it happens gradually. It's not like a light switch it's like a journey.” “Yeah! Like the Hobbit but with more sex.” Matt laughed and laid his head on the table. 

“The Hobbit is not ruined for me, anyway. How often do you get sexually aroused in a day?” Both girls thinking before Karen started. “I don't normally get aroused in the work week because I'm too busy.” “Depends on how bored I am.” “I mean it also depends on the day.” “Some days not at all, but then some days it's all day.” “If we're talking like a number I'm gonna go with once a day, two to three times a day.” “Are you for real?” Karen laughed and turned to (Y/n). “What about you? Huh?” “Uh, I'm gonna say. Five to ten times a day.” “A day! Oh my god!” “Is that abnormal? Oh god, am I some sort of sex machine? What do other people say?” Both of the boys stared at them, shock written on their faces as Foggy read the next question.

“What do you do if you get aroused in public?” (Y/n) smiled as she thought, Karen obviously still thinking. “It's not uncomfortable like it is for guys because they have to physically hide a boner. We're just like 'ha ha no one knows I'm horny.' But I mean, you also kinda feel like an amnesiac because you're just like 'where'd I park the car?” The girls laughed as Karen continued the practically one sided conversation. “I think I just carry it home or until I'm somewhere, where I can get rid of it.” “Oh! Put it in the spank bank!” “I totally know what that is.” “The spank bank is what you masturbate to Karen. It's where you keep all those particularly dirty thoughts in your head.” Karen shook her head in agreement as Foggy read the last question. 

“Is arousal more mental or physical?” “Dude, sex is like 90% mental and 10% physical.” “All in the brain!” “Yeah, like a good make out session can turn me on more then other kinds of foreplay.” “The physical part is the most boring part about it for me. Which confuses guys because they're like 'I'm doing all these cool tricks!' and I'm just like 'I don't need you to do a cool trick.” Both girls laughing as Foggy stood up, bright red in the face. 

“Well, I learned a lot about you two I wish I didn't know now. I'm gonna go home and contemplate life.” “Sorry Fogface!” (Y/n) called out as he left the office, Matt soon to follow the girls out. 

“See you tomorrow Matty!” The girls called as they walked away, leaving Matt standing at the door of their firm.

“Such strange girls.”


End file.
